So, when your child has something bad happen, something unspeakable, it's hard to know what to do. She wasn't hurt physically, so it's nothing like that. But it's worse than a breakup with a boyfriend, much worse. As a mom, I want her to hurry her process. I want her to get away from the place of sadness as quickly as possible. I want her to look on the bright side. I want her to understand logically that years from now, this will all make sense.
So, yesterday morning I don't know what happened. I woke up to a voice, a thought bubble, an epiphany that told me to let her follow the advice I keep giving myself. I have to urge her to feel her pain. She needs to move through it all. Rage, anger, sadness, maybe even depression, but God I hope not. Because if she doesn't move through it, if she tries to suppress it, it could drag her down for the rest of her life.
My challenge as a Mom will now be to accept and support her feelings, no matter how much I wish she didn't have to experience.
See - if you listen to yourself - the answer does come.
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